i don't have a discord, so no thank you.

Umm, I don't know whether I can vent here or if I have to PM someone, just today was rough.

nvm...

I've been slow on the upkeep of this but feel free to check out my games here for this month! There's lots of design and art contests i'd love for y'all to join!
https://www.sylestia.com/forums/?thread=73418

above

2 above

I think it's okay to vent here... isn't it called 'Anxiety Club' for a reason? I feel like we should be allowed to....

Ok thanks.

(Sorry my mind will jump around a bit)So I'll give you a little backstory. I played a game called Dragon Sim. I met a few ok people but no one that was really that interesting. Then one day I log on and I meet this guy, I'll call him Ari. He became a good friend (one of the best I ever had) and we made fun of one another (I need that in relationships i don't want to have to hold my tongue in front of my friends). Ari also introduced me to another game called WOA (Wild Animals Online) We had a lot of fun on both games. WOA the friend aspect doesn't work very well so you can't see if your friends are on or not or where they are. One day I log on to Dragon Sim and see my friend list completely erased and my dragon level lower. My tablet lost my info from the last month. I couldn't find Ari again and haven't since. That was the start of being depressed. I have never had a lot of friends since i'm home schooled. I have one really close friend (I'm gonna call her Julie)and one that is really hard for me to be friend with (She can be Sarah). Julie and my sister have been the only reason I'm not seriously depressed. I feel like almost every time I am with someone they want to hang with someone else and I'm the last priority. I'm a shy person so I don't like to put myself out there (unless I'm singing for people I don't know) So my sister is depressed too and I often feel left out since my parents would rather do what she wants to do than what I do. I don't want to tell people that i'm like this because, I'm afraid that they will think I'm just trying to draw attention to myself because I never act like it. I think Ari would be the only one I would be able to talk to about this. I have a crush on some guy at church sense i was six (Lets call him Tim) I'm not friends with him because I am way to shy for that I also have a lot of anxiety when I'm around him. I also think that I have a small crush on Ari. It makes me feel like a terrible person because of the fact I have a crush on 2 people! I haven't told anyone that either. I don't know what to do! So I have dealt with people betraying me for a long time here is some of what I remember. So 1 or 2 years ago our church was participating in a game group in a town about an hour away, it was my first time there when it happened. Tim, me and a few other church teens went to the game group, after the short bible study we had some free time before people started getting games together. Tim asks me and another girl if we want to go jogging, I shyly say yes. The other girl didn't come so it was just me and the guy I have liked for my entire life are kinda alone (I say kinda because people couldn't hear us but they can still see us). He loves killing ground squirrels (which there are a lot of them around were i live) and after trying to capture one in a tube and failing he wondered off to kill some. As I am walking to my sister, one of her friends (That I really disliked then and now) comes from behind me and says "Your boyfriend is off killing ground squirrels" and I almost turned around and punched him in the stomach. I didn't tho and I nervelessly responded with "How do you know". I found out later that he straight up lied to my face when he said "It's obvious". I almost started crying. Later that night I told my sister, she said that she told him. I trusted her with that secret and she went and told someone. Part of me still doesn't trust her.
That latest bit of sadness can be found here --->https://www.sylestia.com/forums/?thread=73852
Thanks for reading this. :)

heya can i join?