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TheWildOne
Level 62
Majestic Green Thumb
Joined: 6/5/2019
Threads: 70
Posts: 1,662
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 12:13 AM
Post #1551
Could you please ping the therapist pings for me for the post above? when I tried it said you can't ping a user that doesn't exist and I don't know who it is, but I thought you might :) sorry, I worked out who it was. Sorry for the unnecessary ping. O_O
Edited By Thewildone on 1/30/2020 at 1:03 AM.
TheWildOne
Level 62
Majestic Green Thumb
Joined: 6/5/2019
Threads: 70
Posts: 1,662
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 1:04 AM
Post #1552
Please see my big post. It is the one before the post above
TheWildOne
Level 62
Majestic Green Thumb
Joined: 6/5/2019
Threads: 70
Posts: 1,662
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 1:04 AM
Post #1553
See above
Vaingel
Level 72
Warden of Umbra
Joined: 5/17/2018
Threads: 38
Posts: 1,514
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 6:42 PM
Post #1554
I'd give you a hug if I could
Violin lessons... will help you... with college... I've lost faith in the human race as a whole, ngl
You have something to offer. If no one can see it, they probably don't need to see it. People think they want what they can't have. The spotlight's no better than the shadows; it just lets people see your flaws more clearly. I've had a foot in every world, and they all suck. Big time. Straight facts: bite the bullet and decide what you're going to be. Succumb to what you think you have to be, or become what you want to be.
(I'm not good at this 'feelings' stuff... I'm not one to dance around emotional volcanoes, muttering extravagant and moving incantations and hoping I put together the words right so they hopefully carry meaning across to whatever gods of the human mind will calm the mountain before it blows. I've got things to say, and zut ce I'll say them)
I've cried
I've told him precisely what he needed to hear, and what I needed to say
I've hugged him countless times
I've listened
I've offered support
I've given advice
I got professional help for him
I ask him how he's doing every time we meet
It's like he fights it, like he doesn't want help
Still he comes to me, like I have all the answers
Like I'll magic things better
Mais je suis un cul. Je ne suis pas un bonhomme. Il n'y rien je peut faire.
How do i help someone who refuses to be helped?
Enyo
Level 70
Nature Walker
Joined: 1/19/2016
Threads: 14
Posts: 1,713
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 8:18 PM
Post #1555
I think you should talk to you coach / teacher. It may seems hard, but if you do it, things might get better. What is sure is that the situation will not change if you do nothing.
What are the laws concerning image right and privacy right where you live? In my country, what they did (taking pictures of you and diffusing them without your consent) is illegal. If it is also the case where you live, and they continue even after you've talked with your coach, or if your your coach does nothing to help you, you could even consider to go talk to the police.
If all the girls in your volley-ball team are so mean with you that you it gives you anxiety, maybe you should consider eother quitting volley-ball (is there any other sport/activit you like?) or finding a new team.
But even if you do that, the girls should be punished. (In a perfect world, the coach would make THEM leave the team)
Larkian
Level 75
The Tactician
Joined: 5/15/2018
Threads: 104
Posts: 16,999
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 8:43 PM
Post #1556
I mean, I need my resume to look good.... And being in chamber pot orchestra will help.... But I probably can't get into chamber pot orchestra without lessons so it makes sense in a weird way, but starting from zero honestly sucks. I was honestly pretty good at piano, even if I didn't love it or refuse to accept it, but it was something (maybe the only thing) I was good at and I guess I used it as a crutch. Well, now my crutch is gone and I get to faceplant or whatever metaphor you like. And what good does college do when you have no idea where you're even going in life? I know this is like a "first-world problem", like c'mon Lark you could be married off and having kids at this age, you should be grateful you can have a future, go to college, in any field you choose. But sometimes I think life would be a lot simpler if I was a Mongolian nomad. I mean, not that I really want to be a Mongolian nomad that badly, but... you get the idea. Computer science is cool I guess but not my thing. No, Mother, I DO NOT WANT TO BE A DOCTOR. And suggesting all the different types of doctors I can be instead if I don't want to be around sick people isn't really helping. I don't want anything to do with the medical field. Actually scratch that, being a paramedic or whatever would be sweet, but they don't really approve of that idea, and I don't know much about it. Once I said something about being volunteering for the Red Cross or something and they looked horrified. Reply was something about me only wanting to follow my friends, since my best friend wants to work in the medical field (epidemiology or something). I was embarrassed and gave it up, even though they were wrong I didn't want to push it.
Journalist eh, I like the traveling part and I do like writing, but just not that type of writing.
I sound like Newt Scamander, I don't wanna work in an office xD
I just wish there was something I was passionate about. Writing, maybe, but that's more of a side job I guess... I love birds but not enough to go into ornithology so looks like I'm stuck with computer science like my brother. Yay, one more thing I have to live up to. Pfft
Oh, and speaking of that, why do I have to live up to every single amazing standard my brother sets? You say I don't have to, but you still compare me to him like I'm a failure or something. "Your brother doesn't whine when we ask him to do something even if he hates it" and yadda yadda. What are you going to do next, blame it on the fact that he was born with perfect pitch and I wasn't? Why can't you freaking accept that we are two different people? And that just because I give in to everything, he should be the same way and not talk back to you or whatever? Oh and apparently if I put the blame on someone else for a mistake that was actually their fault, that's called making excuses and I should own up, but if you blame my father, who is currently working three hours away and has been since Monday, for doing something only you could have done and I call you out on it, now I'm "trying to blame you for everything"? And if you go to Malaysia to get away from your ungrateful children, I honestly will be a little less stressed. Can you please stop trash-talking my brother behind my back. Thanks.
Mom: Ugh your brother is such a terrible child, what did I do wrong, why can't he do anything we want him to do?
Me: He got into Stanford...
Mom: So?
Me: That's kind of a big deal...
Mom: No it isn't. Stop talking nonsense. No wonder you don't have any friends.
Me: -_-
This is going to sound really whiny and stupid, but you can slap me for being self-absorbed afterwards.
I'm so underrated. Wait, that sounded like I'm really full of myself. I swear I'm not, or at least I don't think I am. I don't want to be in the spotlight *shudders*, never wanted to be, but I don't want to be treated like a random chair. Mildly intriguing, because there shouldn't be a chair in the middle of the blacktop, but nothing of much interest. I waved at someone and called their name, they said hi, came over, promptly forgot my existence, and started talking animatedly to my best friend instead about something or other. It's really stupid, but sometimes I wonder if I just fade from perception at times. I try, I really do. I talk to people, I say hi to people in the hallways, I stop hiding behind people and attempt to be outgoing. And I do make acquaintances, people who I'm close enough to so that it won't be weird if I talk to them out of the blue in a class, but never close enough. Also, same best friend above kind of ditched me, it's a really weird painful situation, if I ranted about it right now it would take up the entire post *sigh*
If he's coming to you, he thinks he can be helped by you
That's something
Professional help will do nothing if he doesn't want to listen to them
You can do something if he thinks you can
Mei geren dou bushi pigu ma? Ni shige haoren. Xiangxin wo. Nin keyi zuo dian shenme. Ruguo meiyou, ni keyi da wo yi bazhang.
If you put that into Google translate, it kind of dies. But I can say it out loud fine.
I don't know what else to say
Edited By Larkien on 2/12/2020 at 2:57 PM.
TheWildOne
Level 62
Majestic Green Thumb
Joined: 6/5/2019
Threads: 70
Posts: 1,662
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 9:05 PM
Post #1557
My coach does has noticed most things and has told them off a quite a few times. Thanks for your advice. I am going to try really hard to talk to my coach after school. I think it is illegal where I live but I am not 100% sure. I think I do have a chance though to play with theolder team.
Primitive
Level 45
Joined: 8/4/2016
Threads: 17
Posts: 227
Posted: 1/30/2020 at 9:06 PM
Post #1558
I'm 17 and fresh out of a 100 day rehab :)
Life is so different back at home, and I'm scared of ruining anything and having my parents not like me again
Enyo
Level 70
Nature Walker
Joined: 1/19/2016
Threads: 14
Posts: 1,713
Posted: 1/31/2020 at 12:54 AM
Post #1559
@Thewildone
If your coach cares about you and about this situation, it's a good thing.
Do all the girls in the team really dislike you? Or is there one or two leaders, and the rest are only followers? In this second case, if the leaders are fired from the team, the others might stop.
Honestly, if I was a coach, I would not keep people like that, even if they are good. Team spirit is important in team sports!
I think it would be a good thing if you can switch team. Even if they stop harassing you, it is not fun to play with girl who doesn't like you for some reasons and speak behind yoir back.
I Hope the situation will get better soon!
Edited By Enyo on 1/31/2020 at 12:56 AM.
Enyo
Level 70
Nature Walker
Joined: 1/19/2016
Threads: 14
Posts: 1,713
Posted: 1/31/2020 at 1:11 AM
Post #1560
@Primitive
It's good news!
I hope everything will go well for you at home :)
I can't speak for experience about your case, as I have none for this situation and I don't know your parents, but if they are good parents, I'm sure they still love you (and did even when they were angry or disappointed) and are also scared of making mistakes.
In any case, try to not stress too much and don't be hard on yourself :)
(I know it's easier to say that than to it unfortunately x) )
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